11 August, 2005

Monkeys in the Bed, Retreat, Question of the Day, Dude

Monkeys in the Bed
I woke up this morning with two little monkeys in my bed - and they were getting riled up!

Meggie, who wakes up at the crack of dawn (or earlier, especially on the weekend!) was awake and had climbed in the bed to wake everyone else up and play! She is too young to know that you should just turn on the TV and play quietly until everyone else wakes up. But I digress...so she is standing on the bed, tripping over the pillows and the covers and the occupants, yelling and laughing and having a wonderful time. I was trying to stay asleep, Molly was yelling, "No! Stop it! Make her stop!" And Bob was...sleeping!

When I finally shook off the bizarre dream I was having aside and woke up, I looked around and wondered why there were 2 extra wiggly and loud children in my bed. And I realized that we really are going to have to start locking the door. Or put up an electric fence. Or something.

This weekend I am going on a retreat with the class of 2006 of Leadership Rowan. I am really looking forward to it! I only know one person who is going, which kind of makes me nervous, but at the same time, it means there are a whole bunch of people to get to know - potential friends, business associates, sponsors, links to other people in the community.

I am also excited about what I am about to embark on - I love to learn, I love training, I love the whole scene.

Plus, Grandma is keeping the kiddiewinks tonight, and I will be at the retreat Friday and Saturday - three nights of good sleep?!?!

Who knows - I might get smart again with that much rest! And just wait until my blog on Sunday - it's bound to be witty and urbane, not sophomoric and well, crappy.

Question of the Day
What is the most important book you have ever read? What book changed your life? Why? How? Did you know it when you were reading it, or when you finished, or sometime later? What was it about the book that changed your life?

Because I read so much, and I read from the perspective of a writer (wannabe), it's hard to pick one defining book. But I think one for me was Beach Music by Pat Conroy - because I realized several things as I was reading it and after I finished it-
1. Good works of fiction contain elements of both comedy and tragedy - just like real life
2. Good and bad mingle freely within each character - just like real life.
3. If a writer loves a place enough, and mentions it often enough, and ties the characters to it enough, then that place can become a character in the book, just like real life.
4. All fiction is autobiographical fiction

Plus, that book was just damn good!

So yesterday Carolyn and I were having an email conversation during which she called me dude. When I was rehashing my day after dinner, as I often do, I thought, "Why did she call me dude? That's new!"

So I called her and I said, "Hey, you called me dude. What's up with that?"

And she said that this girl in her cube neighborhood calls everybody dude and says dude all the time and now Carolyn has picked it up.

We laughed, we moved on, we talked about other stuff.

And she proceeded to call me dude no less than 4 more times in the next 20 minutes.

I was laughing so hard I nearly pulled something and Bob just looked at me...he did not get it at all. He thinks we are weird and crazy and basically whack jobs as it is.

Come on, Dude. Get with it.

Well spunky!


10 August, 2005

Stuck, Gimme the Short Version, Question of the Day, But I Haven't Said Yes to the Christmas Play Yet

Usually I am pretty savvy about the meaning of songs. I listen to the lyrics, sometimes I even look them up and read them, and since I have been known to be aware of what is going on in celebrities' lives, I usually put two and two together and figure out what a given song is about.

Not so with Chariot by Gavin DeGraw. What is he talking about?

I do not get that song at all. Therefore I do not like it. What is he, Spartacus?

And yet they play it incessantly on the radio station I listen to (much like they did Drops of Jupiter by Train a couple of years ago, leading one woman to email the station and ask people to purchase the CD if they liked the damn song so much...) and now it is stuck in my head. DAMN THEM!

Gimme the Short Version
Bob and I used to work with this guy who was a great guy, but he was incapable of just telling you something. He had to tell you the whole story, incorporating every single minute detail until you just wanted to shake him! Our boss at the time was very impatient. He would take it as long as he could, and then he would yell, "Gimme the short version, Larry!"

That is how I felt in both meetings I had yesterday. In one, the chair was off on a tangent, ranting about the people who were not at the meeting. I finally said "Well, for those of us who are here, let's get some work done."

That changed his tune. I basically took over the meeting after that and we got some stuff done.

The second meeting was the Child Development Center Board at church. A bit more delicate. But 2 1/2 hours later, I just really wanted the short version.

Bottom line it, give me something to do, and send me on my way.

Question of the Day
Have you ever seen a toddler freak dance? I have. It's HI-larious.

You should come over and watch Meghan freak dance to the Judds and/or Hokey Pokey Elmo. Now THAT will make your day!

Molly used to do the Molly dance - everyone knew that anytime she heard music she was going to start doing her thang - and it was so cute! Now she thinks running around really fast in a circle in whatever space is allotted is dancing.

She is a mess!

But I Haven't Said Yes to the Christmas Play Yet
Last night before our meeting I had a long talk with Dr. Carl.

We talked about some CDC stuff and then he got to the meat of it - had I decided whether or not to be an elder.

I asked him what he thought made a good elder. He said "you." He gave me a lot of reasons that he thought I would be good - some very personal, but one was so dead on it shocked me...well...stupid. "Part of it is always leading the church in new ways, to do new things, to be better and different and approach the same old things with new eyes and with a desire to inspire growth."

I thought about it and I prayed about it and I said yes. I knew when Molly told me a little over a year ago, "Mommy, I want to go to church at my school" that this was the place I was supposed to be and that this place was going to be dramatically important and integral to my life. So I am watching that happen and develop, and I know that I am not a good enough person to do this. But I also know that none of us are worthy...we just have to try to be.

So mark your calendars, ladies and gents. I will be ordained in January, assuming all goes well between now and then.


09 August, 2005

Freak O' The Week, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, Question of the Day, But It's Not Even Labor Day...

Freak O' The Week
Happy Tuesday - you know what that means - time to crown the new FOTW!

And it's....(drumroll please).....this guy!

Bill Tangeman has made it his life's work to visit every Starbucks on the planet.

Or some shit.

He went to 29 in one day.

Do you know how much this freak must have spent on coffee?? I mean, really, people are starving!

Now here is my question - why? They all kinda look alike and they all pretty much have the same menu...why not just go to your own Starbucks 29 times per day and call it even? (You know there is one near him - there is one near everybody).

So congratulations Bill Tangeman, you are our FREAK O' THE WEEK!

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen
I did not know that 15 month old children could be stricken with insomnia. Seriously.

She went to bed at 9. She was fine...sleeping like a little log. At 1 AM on the dot she screamed like a banshee and she was up until almost 5. We changed her, we fed her, we rocked her, we let her watch a little TV, we sang to her, we tried to give her some baby Motrin in case something was hurting, and do you know what she did? She threw up (on purpose - she did not want the baby Motrin, apparently), she watched TV, she faked asleep, let us put her down and as soon as she heard us sigh, BOOM she jumped out of her little bed and came running into our bedroom, trying to climb in our bed so she could wake us back up to play. I hope for her sake that she sleeps in this morning.

Good Lord.

Question of the Day
If you could see into your future, would you want to?

Would you want to know how it all turns out?

What if you had the power to change it?

What if you didn't?

I don't think I would. I think I will take my chances and make it up as I go along. There is such a thing as too much knowledge (I know that is shocking from a news and information, tips and strategies junkie such as myself), but I think part of the human condition, part of our reason for being is to learn how to deal with things, good and bad, as they happen.

So, no.

But It's Not Even Labor Day...
I got an email from Dr. Carl asking people to sign up to be in the church CHRISTMAS PLAY.

(whining) But it's not even Labor Day...

I know we will need to start practicing soon and all that, so as to avoid the spectacle that was the Easter Play. And I really want to do it - I love the spotlight! (No, you say, not you! Yes me!! I am a media and spotlight whore - even at church!) But I want to make sure I have the time to commit before I get involved. So, maybe I can be the Virgin Mary!

Chew on that one this morning, ladies and gents!

Love ya bye!


08 August, 2005

Just couldn't resist

See, Cheerleaders ARE good for something (other than THAT)

Cheerleaders use chant to help police
Associated Press
ANN ARBOR, Mich. - A man who left an accident scene was tracked down with the help of some cheerleaders who witnessed the crash and turned his license plate number into a cheer, police said.
Members of the Lincoln High School varsity cheerleading squad from neighboring Ypsilanti were in Ann Arbor for a Universal Cheerleaders Association's camp when they saw the wreck near the University of Michigan campus.
"I knew I was going to not remember it because there was too much going on," coach Patricia Clark said Monday on NBC's "Today." "So, when I ran down the street and got the plate number, I yelled to the girls: 'Remember this!'"
The cheerleaders put their skills to work, chanting the license number.
"The coach just said it and we were saying it over and over, and then it just turned into a big chant since we kept repeating it," said Kimmie Ostrowski, a senior captain for the team who also appeared on "Today."
According to police reports, a truck hit a car stopped at a traffic light Wednesday, and the impact forced that car into another vehicle, which then hit another one.
The truck driver, found at his home, told officers he didn't think the damage was severe enough to stop, police Lt. Mike Logghe told The Ann Arbor News.
The man wasn't arrested and his name wasn't released, but police said he could face a misdemeanor charge of leaving the scene of an accident

(From www.charlotte.com)

What If..., Buh-Bye, Question of the Day, A Voice Silenced

What If...
What if we started excluding people from jobs, say the military, police, fire, EMT, ministers, teachers, nurses, doctors, or even garbage men, because they had, say, red hair?

We say to young red heads, deciding on their majors in their first or second year of college, or maybe the end of high school, you know, I know we have shortages in these areas, and we'd love to have someone talented, energetic, and enthusiastic like yourself in one of these very important professions, because the blondes and the brunettes just can't supply us with enough people to meet the needs of our society, but you've got that flaming red hair and, well, it just wouldn't look good for a red head to be a (fill in the blank.)

Have you thought about being an actor or a designer or a chef?

Or maybe you could dye your hair? No, you're proud of your hair and you don't care who knows it? But it'll be so much harder for you...if you would just...no?

Deep sigh.

Well, there is nothing else we can do for you here. You know the risk you are taking. Someone will say something sooner or later and you can't say you didn't know...

This, I imagine, is what GLBT youth go through - maybe not quite so overtly or blatantly, and maybe they have not come to terms with, or begun to understand, their sexuality at that point in their lives. But the idea that we, as a society, have decided that gays should or should not hold certain jobs, should or should not answer God's call, is absolutely absurd.

I do not believe that a person can choose his or her sexuality. I did not sit down one day and say, "Boys or girls - which one works for me?" I always knew I loved boys and men. I can not imagine that the gay people I know and love sat down and thought, "You know, life is hard and it's a piss-ass world out there, but let me go ahead and be gay, too, on top of all that." So why does society feel it is imperative to exclude gays from certain professions? What gives anyone moral authority over anyone else? What gives one group the right to decide what options another group of people has?

Today the Lutherans are voting on gay ministers and gay marriage. I pray that they will do what Jesus would have done - accept and love and nurture and accept gifts from everyone who shows up. Gay or straight...because we are all children of God.

Sibling rivalry is an ugly, ugly thing.

Last night was the last episode of Queer as Folk. The alleged "shocking" series finale was not shocking in the least.

Justin moved to New York to pursue his art career. The lesbians moved to Canada to be gay. Ted and Tad broke up. Emmett and Drew broke up. Ted and Emmett went skiing and met new/old people. Ben and Michael are adopting Hunter. Brian, alone, re-discovered his edge, re-opened Babylon, and the thumpa thumpa keeps on going....

Kind of disappointed. I expected more of QAF. Kinda cheesy...but now it's over.

Buh bye, Queer as Folk.

Question of the Day
How did this book get published?

The Natural Cures book - $30 and it's by a guy with no medical training who is a convicted felon...

Damn. I am obviously not working hard enough on this book business and I don't deserve the success I crave....

A Voice Silenced
Peter Jennings died - he was 67. He had lung cancer. He announced it in March and now his voice is silenced. He had a remarkable run, a remarkable life and brought us news of the most pivotal and defining events of my lifetime, anyway.

Godspeed, Mr. Jennings.


07 August, 2005

Shocked Stupid, Family = Crazy, Question of the Day, Week Ahead

Shocked Stupid
As in, I had this big juicy piece of gossip that I got from Carolyn that I forgot to tell Jeff and he was very upset with me and my lame ass excuse was that it was so shocking I just forgot and I must have been...

"Shocked stupid??" Jeff asked sarcastically and with a hint of bitch in his voice.

I laughed out loud so hard I scared the children.

Now that, my friends, was funny. That is why we love us some Jeff. And that is why if Jeff and I met Kathy Griffin she would totally be our new best friend. She rocks! You have GOT to see her stand up act. I haven't seen her reality show yet (it's recorded, but definitely has to be watched after the kiddiewinks are in bed).

By the way, Clay is gay, Oprah really is a freak and Anna Nicole needs to limit her Trim Spa intake.

These are the things I have learned from Kathy and I know she's right because she is on TV and otherwise - you know it - laughed myself stupid.

Family = Crazy
This weekend was all about Bob's uncle and grandfather moving. Jeeezusss. They just love to keep some shit stirred up and some crazy going...this brother, that sister, you know who we ain't heard from, Aunt Sissy and her lame, mute, deaf and transsexual half-nephew...whew! I feel so dirty and redneck after a weekend of their craziness. They don't like any other races, ethnicities, socioeconomic groups, religions, national origins, sexual orientations, family structures or ideologies. They are like a reverse Statue of Liberty - keep your poor, your tired, your huddled masses, cause they might be different from us and we can't have that.

It just annoys me to no end, because I have worked very hard to overcome the racial and ethnic biases my own family burdened me with, and we have both worked very hard to raise the M's with no prejudice...and then these people just shove it down your throat...how rude! Get a life! Get a job! Get some tolerance and open your mind to the possibility that someone else might, just might, be just as OK as you are.

So yeah, family = crazy and I am very glad to be going back to work tomorrow...

Question of the Day
Me - hypocrite?

We all know that I have weight issues, and I have for most of my life, right?

And I try very hard to believe that a person should be judges by who they are and what they contribute to the world, not what they look like.

So then why, oh why, does it bother me that there is a fat kid in the new JC Penney ads for back to school?

Is it because she is the only one and it's obvious that she is the token fat kid? Am I brainwashed by the media to believe that only thin people "belong" on TV? Is it because I don't want to be reminded of my own childhood? Or is she a future BBW (Big Beautiful Woman) and I am threatened by her acceptance of her own body?

That's a lot to get out of a JC Penney ad....

Week Ahead

Cra-ZEEE let me tell you!

Monday - they are coming from the radio station where I won an award to take pictures.

Tuesday - Board meeting of the Third Pres Child Development Center

Wednesday - Who knows

Thursday - Leadership Rowan Banquet

Friday, Saturday and Sunday - Leadership Rowan Retreat

Woo hoo - busy!

But for Jeff's sake, I will try to keep posting daily with the exciting anecdotes, juicy tidbits, and hilarious hijinks that make up my life.

Have a great week, y'all!