29 August, 2005

Nuts from Mr. Bob; Maisy - What are you doing?; Question of the Day; New Orleans Memories

Nuts from Mr. Bob
My grandmother has a gentleman friend...Mr. Bob. He is a wonderful man.

My grandmother was married to two of the 3 biggest a-holes on the planet (the third being my other grandfather). They mistreated her, cheated on her, drug her around the world, literally drove her to drink, tore her down until she thought all she deserved was them, and generally made her miserable and unavailable to the rest of us. But now, at 80, she has met the love of her life. His name is Bob, and he was a pharmacist in the town where they live. He owns a farm and a lot of land by the river and his beloved wife's funeral was the day Nana's second husband died. He and Nana met again not long after that and they were friends, and they courted, and he loves her to distraction. They are both very fit and they do all kinds of farm chores together, and ride 4-wheelers and one weekend they even planted 2500 trees on the farm.

My parents went recently to visit them and Mr. Bob sent us a box of nuts - not to eat, but to plant. He and Nana came to visit us one Saturday on their way to Mom and Dad's and he must have felt bereft at our treeless landscape - so he sent us a box of nuts to plant and grow chestnut and walnut and hickory trees.

And so this week I am planting those nuts - and I am hoping and praying that they will sprout and grow. And one day, many years from now after Nana and Mr. Bob are gone, I will look out into my yard, and see the trees, and remember. Nana was happy - at the end of her life - and that even though she had to go through hell to get there, she, at least, thought it was worth it.

Maisy - What are you doing?
Meggie LOVES Maisy. Maisy is a cartoon kids show about Maisy mouse, Eddy elephant, Tallulah chicken, Cyril squirrel and Charlie alligator who are best friends. There are many things wrong with Maisy that I can no longer overlook.

1. All the animals are roughly the same size.
2. Charlie, the alligator, has big old teeth. They are outlined in red. It looks like he has been eating bloody meat all the time. Watch out, Maisy!
3. One day they played see saw. Eddy the elephant was on one side. All the others were on the other. They were pressed up against each other in a line on the see-saw and thrusting, apparently, to offset the weight of the elephant on the other side. It was obscene. I just can't get past it.
4. They all change clothes in front of each other with no problem.
5. One day Cyril wet his pants, and Maisy took him inside and gave him new clothes (which did not match). However, no attempt was made to clean him up. Jeesh! Get a wipe!
6. Charlie sounds like he has some sort of developmental delay, or is a 4-year old version of Beavis.
7. With all the cast members, you can only pick out every third word - the rest is just squeaks and whistles. I think it is subconscious and is telling Meggie to climb stuff and get in the liquor cabinet.

But Meggie spends most of her waking hours wandering around looking for an adult to give the remote to and says "My Maisy."

Better, I guess, than Cops or Barney.

Question of the Day
What is up with this summer? Will it ever end?
I was talking to some other women at church yesterday - we want Fall weather, Fall clothes, food, power bills, etc.

I love fall because it is anticipatory - and you have Thanksgiving, and Christmas is just around the corner....the nights are clear and cold and it's just wonderful.

Go away, summer, go away.

New Orleans Memories
With Katrina bearing down on NOLA, I am reminded of one of my family's favorite memories...
My brother and I were kids, and we lived in either Lafayette or Alexandria - anyway, my parents and their best friends, Rick and Libby, and their kids all decided to go to Mardi Gras. Sure, 4 kids under 5 years old would be no problem at Mardi Gras!

So Rick was walking down Bourbon Street with my brother on his shoulders. That meant Jason was tall enough to see in some of the places. One in particular was a drag show. My baby brother, no more than 2 1/2, was enraptured by the beautiful men/women dancing in gorgeous costumes, born to the wrong bodies, correcting where they believed Mother Nature had been mistaken. He loved it.

Rick saw and tried to walk faster.

Jason would have none of it. "Wait, Mr. Wick," he said with his speech impediment that lasted until 3rd grade and was born of sheer laziness. "I want to look."

And, had my brother turned out gay, that would surely be the incident that was blamed.

A few years ago I was awarded a grant workshop, including travel, workshop, lodging, etc. in New Orleans. Molly was only 5 months old but I went. Sunday morning in NOLA is ugly - shop owners and barkeeps spraying vomit off the sidewalk, the sun shining, the heat starting to build, the beautiful, lacy wrought iron looking delicate and feminine, vagrants and college student passed out in alleyways. But the Hurricane drink shop was open (no blue laws) and before 10:00 am I was walking down the street sipping a hurricane in a styrofoam cup, just because I could.

I also saw my first drag show in NOLA, at the Rainbow, and the gays I was with were furious because I, an experienced hag, charmed our very cute waiter and got free drinks and better seats, and he flirted with me and ignored them.

Too bad, old trolls!

Keep New Orleans and the whole gulf coast in your prayers.



At 10:24 AM, Blogger Marvin said...

I heard on the radio that Cafe du Monde is still standing. This is great news. Stiff coffee is mandatory for any morning in the French Quarter, especially while spraying the vomit away!

There was a hickory tree in my front yard that simply blazed in the fall, set against the green pine trees and burgundy-colored dogwoods. That'll be a nice addition to your yard!


Post a Comment

<< Home